Interstellar Travel and Time Travel? Never! Says Killjoy Hawking

The major tropes upon which most science fiction is based, time travel and visiting other worlds, will never be achieved by humankind, according to professional bonfire urinator (and astrophysicists) Professor Stephen Hawking.

In a BBC interview with comedian (and physicist) Dara Ó Briain, Professor Hawking said that traveling back in time is theoretically impossible, and that mankind will not leave the solar system in our lifetime, if ever. Professor Hawking told Ó Briain, “I still believe that time travel to the past is not possible for macroscopic effects,” adding that “You can’t send a message back in time.” The ‘Grandfather Paradox’? Stop wasting your bloody time, Hawking says.

Regarding interstellar travel, he says, “The present breed of humans won’t reach the stars.” The distances are too great. The radiation exposure would be too severe.” In an uncharacteristic spirit of optimism, however, Hawking does concede that it could be possible if we were to “genetically engineer humans or send machines.”

Oh, and in case you were wondering, there is no God – “I think the afterlife is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark” – and entering a black hole will kill you – “If you jump in a black hole, you will meet an unpleasant fate” – so, if you were thinking of doing that, don’t.